Friday, May 13, 2011

I pray

I have noticed that many families show favoritism to their youngest child (unknowingly most of the time). I believe this happens for several reasons. First, the parents have already been there with other children and are more laid back in their approach to every situation. This is the wrong way to approach because each child is different and each situation is different, but despite these things a parent should still try to maintain a consistency throughout. Secondly, the parents, usually, are more financially stable, so they are able to spend more freely. This is no big deal with the exception of going overboard with the youngest. An example of what I mean by that, the oldest child is going off to college, so you take them shopping and buy the cheapest essentials that is needed and tell them to call if other things come up (you will see what you can do), this is all before the job you expect them to get. The youngest goes off to college and you take them shopping allowing them to purchase whatever they want including some little extras, and they don't have to work or if they do it doesn't have to be much. I understand that you would have wanted to do that for the first, second, and whoever else in between, but were not financially able, but you didn't and you taught your children something about being wise with their money as well. Lastly, the parents are older and often ready to move into that next phase in life as the child gets older. In some ways this is a bad thing for the youngest because the parents don't have the energy they used to, in other ways it works out well for them because they have become more laid back in everything. I did some research online regarding statistics about younger children, here are the pros and cons:
Pros:                                             Cons:  
Outgoing                                   Financially irresponsible
Social                                       Spoiled
Charming                                  Manipulative
Creative                                    Self-centered
                                                 Short attention span
My husband pointed out to me the other day that I treat Jewel differently. He said I don't let her cry the way I would her brother when he was her age, and I seem to coddle her more. Stepping back from the situation I see that he is right, and I am glad to be told now. I said all these things more for me than anymore else, because although Jewel will not be our youngest (unless that is what God has planned), if I am starting to be inconsistent now what will I be like 15 years from now. I can only pray that when my children are grown and gone that there will be no resentment in that area. I know I will make mistakes, and I know there will be things my children sit around and talk about saying you got to do this or they gave you that, but I pray in the end it all evens out. I pray that my children are the exceptions the the birth order stereotypes. God help me, please.........

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